How local parishes are creating a network of support — not just resources — to show moms, 'We love you and acknowledge you'
NOVI — Shelly Pozos Lule hadn’t planned for another pregnancy, but in early 2022, she found out she was expecting twins. She already had four children — two boys and two girls — and had recently unexpectedly become a single parent.
“I was married for 10 years. My husband went to get papers and ended up never coming back, so that left my kids and me alone,” Pozos Lule told Detroit Catholic. “I (already) had my tubes tied because we had four kids — we had two boys and two beautiful little girls, and that was the end of our journey of having kids. It was our time to enjoy them and love them and watch them grow and give them everything they need, and then after he left and was not able to come back, I ended up getting pregnant with twins.”
Because of the emotional toll, Pozos Lule lost her job. She moved in with her mom in a small trailer home and sent her two young boys to live with their father’s family in Mexico.
“I had hit rock bottom,” Pozos Lule recounted.
However, a year earlier, Pozos Lule, who lived in Milford at the time, had called dozens of churches and organizations for help avoiding eviction.
One of the parishes she called was Holy Family in Novi, where she spoke to Roxanne Hundsrucker, the parish’s Christian service director. Hundsrucker was able to recommend resources but couldn’t provide direct help because Pozos Lule was outside of her district.
“She said, 'If you don’t hear anything, give me a call back, and we will figure something out,’” Pozos Lule said. “I did figure some things out (and) a year later, I ended up having the boys, and somehow she showed up at my doorstep with a whole bunch of baby stuff — double of everything. She stays in contact with me, makes sure I have diapers, food, gas cards — whatever she can do for me, she does for me. And it is because I reached out to her many years ago — I don’t know how we ended up getting back into contact, but we have been connected ever since.”
Hundsrucker and Pozos Lule have grown close, with the latter showing up at Hundsrucker’s office unannounced to talk about life, ask for advice or bring her girls to shop the parish’s bountiful clothing closet.
“I never ask them for anything beyond diapers, and I am not someone who likes to beg, but Roxanne, because she knows me, she will just call me and say, ‘Hey, I got coats for the boys if you need them.’ I feel like Roxanne and Holy Family found me. Because yes, we are struggling, but there are probably people who need more than me, and she just made me realize everybody needs help.”
Not just saving babies, but walking with their mothers
Hundsrucker has the backing of her parish to support moms like Pozos Lule, but also relies on the wealth of resources organized through Walking with Moms in Need, an initiative launched by the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops in 2020 and adopted by the Archdiocese of Detroit in partnership with Catholic Charities of Southeast Michigan. The initiative aims to equip and assist Catholic parishes and parishioners in raising awareness about resources that help pregnant and parenting moms.
Kathleen Wilson, coordinator of the Archdiocese of Detroit's Gospel of Life and Project Rachel ministries, oversees the initiative within the archdiocese alongside Carolina Aguilar-Gariby, parish engagement coordinator.
Wilson envisions every Family of Parishes within the archdiocese having its own “vibrant” ministry to walk with women — not only within the parish, but also in the surrounding communities.
“Currently, we have upwards of 50 parishes who have gone through much of the process to offer this ‘ongoing work of mercy’ in their parish community,” Wilson wrote in an email to Detroit Catholic.
Wilson explained there is no one “right way to implement the ministry into parish life,” and every parish has done it differently — often in a way that fits their unique charism or gifts. Wilson and her team, in turn, will offer them support.
To become "formally listed as a Walking With Moms In Need parish begins with the desire to make it known that: ‘We are a safe place, a people of life, we see you and are here to help — Come walk with us!’” Wilson said.
The work Hundsrucker has done alongside coworkers, volunteers and parishioners at Holy Family is one example of how Walking with Moms in Need has borne fruit in southeast Michigan.
When the initiative was first announced, despite the lockdowns brought about by COVID-19, Hundsrucker virtually gathered anyone in the parish's circle engaged in pro-life activities or ministries for regular discussions about how to implement the vision into their parish life.
“We started with the parish inventory; we went into a year of things that we were going to do in the way of educating people and informing people of walking with moms in need in the parish,” Hundsrucker told Detroit Catholic.
Hundsrucker took stock of what the Family of Parishes — which also includes St. James in Novi, St. Joseph in South Lyon, and St. William in Walled Lake — had to offer, beginning with the thriving clothes closet at Holy Family.
“When we started, that was a good place (to begin). As we met women who had needs in our community or we encountered a pregnant woman, we would bring them in and show them that we really cared as a Catholic church,” Hundsrucker explained. “We weren’t just about saving babies from being aborted, but we genuinely wanted to help moms who struggled, whether it was in a pregnancy or with an infant or children.”
Appointments to shop in the clothes closet are scheduled in advance, which gives the parish a perfect opportunity to repeatedly welcome people back, get to know them and offer them further accompaniment.
Hundsrucker continues to educate parishioners and bring them on board, and in the meantime, created a calendar where each month, the parish chose a different agency or organization to support.
The ministry was built on what the parish was already offering — Holy Family has been hosting an annual baby shower for Another Way Pregnancy Center for nearly two decades — and now supports even more centers and agencies through diaper or baby formula drives.
The next step was acknowledging pregnant women within the parish community.
“First, we talked about moms who were on their second or third child and how they didn’t have a baby shower,” Hundsrucker said. “You usually have one for the first child, and then by the third or fourth, you’ve reached hand-me-downs.”
Hundsrucker organized a fundraiser, auctioning off gently used designer handbags, and used the money to put together gift bags for expecting mothers with self-care items, snacks, gift cards and prayer cards — items that could be useful while a mother is in labor at the hospital.
“(We want them to know) that, ‘We love you and we acknowledge you,’” Hundsrucker said. “We give note cards that say, ‘Congratulations on your pregnancy.’ It’s reassurance from a stranger that you are a sister in Christ.”
Hundsrucker said the ministry has allowed the parish to help multiple women, and that Pozo Lule is one of six women who so far who have benefited from the diaper bank, which provides diapers for the first year of a child's life and often beyond.
“She sends another person (on the team) or me a text message, and she will say, ‘I am in need of diapers,’ and we arrange to pick up or drop off,” Hundsrucker said. “There are no expectations. Sometimes, I will give her a gas card or food card because I can tell by her tone where she is. She never asks for anything more than the diapers.”
Hundsrucker and the parish's support means the world to Pozo Lule, who said she can't think of another program like Walking with Moms in Need.
“Just when you think you can’t, God shows you a different way. God puts somebody in your life for a reason, and they just show up," Pozo Lule said. "I don’t have any family — Roxanne is to me like a mother; I can call her and ask for advice — she became like a family. She will give me the best advice in the world, and then, as we move forward, she will check in with me.”
A reassurance that somebody cares
Because of how Walking With Moms in Need is organized, it's easy for an individual to utilize its resources without going through their parish. After befriending a young woman, Stephanie, who had moved to Michigan from Texas with her husband, Beth Locricchio, a parishioner at Our Lady of Good Counsel in Plymouth, found out that Stephanie had become unexpectedly pregnant.
Stephanie, a 28-year-old student who asked not to be identified by her real name, said she was “terrified.”
“Some people online were like, ‘You can’t be surprised you got pregnant,’ but it's like if you put your seatbelt on, you still might be surprised you got into a crash,” Stephanie said.
After that, it was a blur, Stephanie explained. While putting herself through school and processing her unexpected pregnancy, Stephanie’s husband left for rehab and was gone for more than two months.
“I was pretty reliant on other people,” Stephanie said.
Locricchio has been one of the many people who have walked with Stephanie, making phone calls to different organizations and helping her get access to items ranging from diapers to gas cards to cat food. Locrocchio added Stephanie has been “a great advocate for herself.”
“She wasn’t sure if she could proceed with the pregnancy, and through that, she just needed a lot of support. I knew just one person would not be able to do it all, and I just couldn’t offer everything she needed,” Locricchio said.
Locricchio describes Walking With Moms in Need as a “network” that combines the gifts and resources of many different agencies and individuals and will walk with moms from the moment of first contact and beyond.
“On your own, it is so hard to do these kinds of things, but when we have the body of Christ, it’s just nice to have all these different people and different resources willing to reach out and help when needed,” Locricchio said. “Even after the pregnancy, they are constantly trying to find different resources for these young women. They really think outside the box. As the name suggests, 'Walking with Moms,' they want it to be personal.”
Stephanie said it can feel hard or impossible to continue a pregnancy without support, and she's been surprised by the amount she has received.
"It was such a long period of time when my husband was gone, and they were helping with rent, utilities, bills, food, and all kinds of gift cards for food. So they would give gift cards that could only be used for food or gift cards that could only be used for gas,” Stephanie said. “I have been able to use those and ensure I have enough food and gas to get places. I think everyone plays a certain part, and that’s how it gets done. It's not a one-and-done kind of thing — different places have focused on different aspects (of need).”
Navigating these resources alone can be daunting for pregnant or parenting mothers. One of Walking With Moms in Need’s great strengths is its ability to consolidate the options and use a network of established organizations to get mothers the assistance they need.
Wilson said she is continuously inspired by the love of Christ poured forth by parishes and by individuals such as Hundsrucker and Locricchio.
“I am reminded of something my mother-in-law often proclaimed: ‘There are so many good people doing so many beautiful things, giving of themselves in so many places; we just need to hear more about them,’” Wilson wrote. “May all women facing difficult pregnancies and those who love them know that they can come for non-judgmental support from each parish community who sees itself as a people, affirming life.”
Beyond assisting mothers like Pozo Lule, the ministry has opened doors to partnerships with pregnancy resource centers, thus strengthening them; priests have become more aware of the need to accompany pregnant and parenting women, and more people have become involved with the pro-life landscape who perhaps wouldn’t otherwise.
Locricchio is heartened to see the tangible pro-life action that has taken place as a result.
“It's one thing to say that you are pro-life, but how are you helping the mothers? How are you helping the babies?" Locricchio said. "It has been such a blessing to see the inroads of so many people coming and walking alongside and putting their energy behind really being that support to these moms.”
As someone who never felt called to do sidewalk counseling, Hundsrucker said Walking With Moms in Need provides her and others with a way to take action.
For Hundsrucker, the next steps involve working as a Family of Parishes to seek out women who need them and inviting them into the parish community, where they can find resources, love and support.
“We need to walk with those women, and we can tell them, ‘No, don’t have an abortion,’ but now we need to see what their needs are,” Hundsrucker said. “A lot of times, it is financial or spiritual or emotional, and if somebody just has that person to mentor them and say, ‘It is going to be OK; God is going to be with you,' that goes a long way. It is not going to be perfect, but God is going to be there, and your needs are going to be met because you are going to encounter people who are going to help you meet those needs.’
“It would be good if we all worked together and found out what we can do to gather up more moms,” Hundrucker added. “I know they are there. They are everywhere, and we have a lot more to give.”
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