Nick Switzer and Madison Chase exchange promises Oct. 22 as part of the Rite of Betrothal, a little-known but age-old Catholic rite for couples planning to marry, at St. Joseph Oratory in Detroit. Canon Michael Stein, ICRSS, the oratory’s pastor, reads the blessing.DETROIT — A happy couple stands before a priest in a beautiful church. Friends and family look on as rings are blessed and exchanged, and words of promise are proclaimed.
But it’s not a wedding. Well, not yet, anyway.
Nick Switzer and Madison Chase stood with Canon Michael Stein, ICRSS, before the St. Mary altar at St. Joseph Oratory in Detroit on Oct. 22 to take part in the ancient Rite of Betrothal.
The little-known but age-old Catholic rite, in which a couple formally has their engagement blessed by a priest, traces its roots to the ancient Jewish custom practiced by Mary and Joseph and is an opportunity to invoke God’s blessing as the couple prepares for marriage.
Nick Switzer and Madison Chase stand outside St. Joseph Oratory in Detroit, where they were betrothed Oct. 22. Betrothal is a little-known, yet ancient rite in the Catholic Church that invited God to bless a couple's wedding preparations. “It’s pretty awesome,” Switzer told The Michigan Catholic. “It’s an old rite in the Church that used to be done more frequently, but nowadays you don’t see it as much.”
Following the 11 a.m. Mass, the couple stood at the altar rail, with Canon Stein reading the rite from the Roman Missal, blessing the rings with holy water before Nick and Madison proclaimed before the Church their intention to marry one another.
The rite is a sacramental — not a sacrament — meaning it’s a sign of the grace the couple will receive through matrimony, aimed at strengthening the couple’s bond before marriage.
“It’s a solemn promise before God, stating we made a promise when he proposed to me,” Chase said. “It’s saying he made a promise to marry me, and he will follow through, and by me saying yes, I will follow through on this promise.”
When Archbishop Allen H. Vigneron invited the Institute of Christ the King Sovereign Priest to St. Joseph in October 2016, Switzer and Chase found an appreciation for the Traditional Latin Mass and the Salesian spirituality the institute brings to the parish.
The couple both attended Roosevelt High School in Wyandotte, two years apart, and went to the Monroe County Fair for their first date in September 2015.
Switzer is a cradle Catholic who grew up going to St. Cyprian Parish in Riverview, while Madison joined the Church this Easter Vigil at Our Lady of Good Counsel Parish in Plymouth.
Interest in traditional Catholic rituals led Chase to a blog called Spoken Bride, where she discovered the Rite of Betrothal.
“When the person posted pictures of it and the reasoning behind it, I knew it was something I wanted to do,” Chase said. “It’s something young adults, especially those who go to a traditional church, love because it’s inviting God into your engagement in a special way.”
Switzer and Chase know of other couples who have taken part in the rite.
“She just came into the church last Easter Vigil, has a great love for Jesus and the church, so she just dove into everything and found this stuff out,” Switzer said. “I was talking to a friend, who will be one of my groomsmen, and said this was awesome. When I talked to people and we say we’re doing this, it starts a conversation about what it means to bring God into the engagement and what it means to get a betrothal as well.”
In the eyes of the Church, there is no difference between an engagement and a betrothal. But Canon Stein explained the Rite of Betrothal adds an extra grace to the engagement and call to Christian courtship.
“You can call it an engagement blessing or a betrothal blessing, but it is two people committing themselves to prepare for marriage,” Canon Stein said. “In the blessing, there is an exchange of words of promise. So it’s not to be confused with a vow; it doesn’t replace or advance the marriage. It’s a promise exchanged in the presence of God, so they can receive the blessing of a fruitful marriage preparation.”
Switzer and Chase add the Rite of Betrothal is an extra special way to invite God into their marriage preparation.
Madison Chase shows off her engagement ring to Erin Doyle after she was betrothed to Nick Switzer at St. Joseph Oratory on Oct. 22. Betrothal is a way for couples to invite God into the marriage preparation process, Chase and her fiancé said.“It takes three to get married, as Bishop Fulton Sheen said, and we always had God at the center of our relationship,” Switzer said. “In the world we live in, we need as much grace as we can possibly get.”
Since Rite of Betrothal isn’t a sacrament, Nick and Madison wouldn’t — heaven forbid — need a dispensation to call off the engagement. But as an annex in the Book of Benedictions, the rite is an added blessing for those who plan to spend their lives together.
“It’s a shame the Rite of Betrothal has fallen out of practice,” Canon Stein said. “We see it in today’s society, so many attacks against marriage. So many young adults facing challenges when it comes to living and persevering in fidelity. That’s why Holy Mother Church has this blessing, to equip them with the grace of God.”
As the special date — Sept. 15, 2018 — draws near, Switzer and Chase are excited to be part of a movement to bring the rite back into practice.
“You’re acknowledging that God is the reason why you’re called to marriage,” Switzer said. “You need Him to follow through on that, because we are weak, and He is love. And we need that from Him.
“It inspires people to ask why we’re doing it, and it’s fun to explain. It inspires people to open their eyes to the beauty of the rite and the Church.”
